5 Reasons I Don’t Shop at Your Store
  photo credit: Justin Marty |
When it comes to where I take my business, I’m a pretty picky customer. I demand a lot of the places I shop, especially the ones I’m going to get into my car and drive to.
First, there are the obvious criteria for where I shop. The store has to be reasonably close, has to have what I need/want, be friendly and has to have reasonable prices. But then there are the less-obvious reasons, reasons that it appears many shop owners and managers forget in their bustle to keep the ship sailing forward.
So, as a public service to those stores I haven’t seen in a while, here are my top five less-common reasons I don’t visit your business. Read more
7 Beers, 7 Countries: A Review
 photo credit: Jayel Aheram |
I’m not a beer drinker. When it comes to my very limited alcohol consumption I’m definitely more of a wine/daiquiri/mixed drink kind of guy. A good bottle of red wine or a jack and coke is more up my alley than pretty much any beer.
However, economic times are tough. We don’t have the income we did a year ago so we’re looking to cut back on our expenses. One of the easiest for us is drinking. Though we love our daiquiris, $20 for two larges (with tip) makes little sense when a six pack of even high-end foreign beer is less than half the price.
So we set out to find a beer that we could enjoy. We had the good fortune to do some overseas traveling in the past year and learned that we liked some foreign beers but the ones we truly enjoyed, such as Duvel beer, were not widely available in the U.S. The goal was to find a beer we could locate easily and enjoy on a whim.
World Market came to our rescue. Their “Make your own six pack” feature let us literally build a six pack of beer from six different countries at an affordable price. So we decided to try and then do a review of it. Here are the results. Read more
Review: My Bloody Valentine 3D
As a tech geek and a horror buff, I have two separate interest in My Bloody Valentine 3D (MBV3D).
First, it supposedly features a (relatively) new, ultra-advanced 3D technology that works better than the old red/blue glasses kind. Second, it is the first slasher film to make it into the theaters in some time (even if it is a remake).
Sure, we’ve had our dose of thrillers, chillers and torture porn, but we’ve lacked a good old fashioned slasher and the latest releases of the major slasher franchises have only reminded us how low the genre can go.
So how was the movie? Well, I’m going to break it apart into its two elements and discuss them individually before I try and bring it all together. Hopefully, by the end of it all, we’ll have some idea where the movie stands and whether anyone else should bother seeing it. Read more
The Death of Honest Review Scores
My parents need a new security suite for their computer. They’re reasonably computer savvy but still asked for my help in picking one. Since I’m a Linux/Mac kind of guy, I decided to do a few searches to see what was new and ran across PC World’s chart of Internet security suites.
PC World is a magazine I have a lot of respect for. They do a lot of great work in the field of reviewing computer products. But I noticed something when I looked at the bottom of the chart. Trend Micro got the lowest score on the list and their “Bottom Line” review reads as follows:
“Trend Micro’s latest suite fails at the most basic task of detecting and blocking malicious software. Not recommended.”
Ouch, seems pretty scathing to me. But then look at the score. It’s a 74/100. On a regular grading scale that would be a middle “C”. On a 1-10 system it would be a 7.5, well above an “average” of 5.
How the Hell do you say something “fails at the most basic task” and then give it an average or even good score? That makes no sense. The full review isn’t much more kind saying that:
“Trend Micro’s suite has some good points, but there’s no getting around the fact that Internet Security Pro 2009 fails at detecting malicious software, and therefore fails as a security program. We cannot recommend buying it.”
Clearly something is wrong with review scores when a 74 is a total failure of a program. It’s time we woke up a little bit and realized that review scores on the Web are garbage and reliance on them is dangerous, especially when dealing with security software.
However, this isn’t a new problem, it’s been going on for quite some time. Read more
Dominos Fail
Last month I wrote about a pretty bad screw up by Pizza Hut by which a coupon on their site disappeared. To summarize, I saw a good deal on the home page (and then again inside the site), went to take advantage of it only to be unable to actually find the coupon.
It was a pretty good disappearing act, I grant Houdini nor even Chris Angel would be impressed, but it certainly was better than any of my attempts at magic.
However, I really have to tip my hat at Dominos, not only did they manage to make a coupon disappear, but a whole dammed pizza. By that I don’t just mean that they made MY pizza disappear, but an entire menu item and not just any menu item, but the menu item they had been pushing down my throat for the past week month.
How did they do it? I’m not exactly sure. But I’ll gladly tell you how the trick went down. Read more
Mardi Gras Monday: Bourbon Balconies
 photo credit: Lyndi&Jason |
Note: This is the first in a series of weekly columns about Mardi Gras. Between now and Lundi Gras, we’ll be covering some of the basics of Mardi Gras, including tips, tricks and suggestions from a local on how to survive Carnival in New Orleans. I’m trying to keep this series as family friendly and as broad as possible, since many people come to Mardi Gras for many different reasons, I want this to serve everyone’s needs.
There are a lot of “B” words that come to mind when one things of Bourbon St. Beads, beer, breasts, bars and booze name just a few. However, “balcony” is the only one that is part of the Bourbon St. architecture.
As you walk up and down the street, balconies literally line the road on both sides, as they do with much of the French Quarter. Apartments have them, bars have them, stores have them, hotels have them and nearly every establishment on the street has at least one.
During Mardi Gras time, these balconies become centers of activity. Revelers, not wanting to be in the crowd below, fill them to capacity. They participate by throwing beads and watching the party below. It comes with an air of exclusivity and it’s a chance to drink and have fun without being jostled by the crowd below.
But is it worth it and how does one get the most out of their balcony experience? The answers are below. Read more
The Ghost of Christmas Fail
 photo credit: krisdecurtis |
Like most modern-day grinches, my loathing of the holiday is a purely adult affair. It most likely started when I was seventeen and first forced to drive in holiday traffic (unarmed no less) and hasn’t really gone away sense. Though I like certain parts of the holiday, I could easily do without most of what it has become.
That being said though, looking at Christmas through a child’s eye is a truly magical thing. I was never big on Santa Claus but I was definitely very excited about seeing family, friends and, of course, the presents.
However, even as a child, Christmas didn’t always go as planned. Though our blunders and mistakes were significantly more comedy than tragedy, they still shatter the image of the “Perfect Christmas”. But in a strange way the memories of Christmas gone wrong are some of the best, not just because they are funny, but they were the some of the best shared experiences my family had.
So what are some of my favorite cases of Christmas fail? Well, here are a few… Read more
Pizza Hut: Coupon Fail
One of these days I’m going to sit down and hammer out all of the reasons that I prefer online ordering of pizza to ordering over the phone. Shockingly enough, it doesn’t come down to laziness (I actually get carryout anyway) but rather order accuracy, speed and paper trail.
That being said, until recently, Dominos is the only pizza place that has had a decent online ordering system. The problem with that being that my local Dominos sucks, being run by the reject cast members of a bad stoner comedy and managed by the evil father from the Twisted Sister music videos (YAY for obscure references), I would almost rather shove pins under my fingernails than set foot inside of there.
When Pizza Hut finally decided to entire the 1990’s and add an online store to their site, I was thrilled. Though my local Pizza Hut is not run much better, at least it gave me a choice and some competition, especially for price.
Though it has been up for a while, I don’t order pizza that often and finally got the chance to give it a try last night. Off the bat, Pizza Hut did everything right. They enticed me with a good deal, lured me to register for the site and even got my information.
The only thing they botched was actually giving me the deal I had clicked on, causing me to leave the site in a huff of anger and a strange hunger for McDonalds.
What happened? Well, let me explain. Read more
Derek Flint: The Ultimate “Bond”
In the mid 60s, the Bond movies were starting to gain traction. With Sean Connery playing the role, the entire world was becoming enamored with 007, his gadgets, his witty remarks and his way with the ladies.
But while James Bond himself might have always been a borderline case of self parody, especially with his one-liners, it was a pair of movies that took that sense of humor to a natural new height. “Our Man Flint” and “In Like Flint”, also known as the “Flint” movies, lampooned Bond not through silly gags or fart jokes, but by simply being more “Bond” than 007 could ever hope to be.
If Bond has a “Bond Babe” then Flint has a dozen. If Bond is a black belt then Flint is a master of a dozen martial arts. If Bond speaks four languages, Flint speaks every single one and can talk to dolphins to boot (thus making him part Aquaman too, I suppose).
Flints movies were not action movies nor were they outright parodies, they were a strange hybrid of the two, meant to be both funny and totally awesome at the same time. Though self-aware and self-depreciating, it was still almost suave enough to pass as an actual comic book spy romp.
The Flint movies, much like their title character, is hard to nail down and define, but simply too cool to turn away from. Read more
The Best Anti-Christmas Tracks 2008
It is that time of year again. The holiday season has been in full swing for about two weeks and, with another two to go, most mortals are already feeling the pinch of holiday burn out.
A well-known Grinch, the same people who shun me the weekend after Black Friday suddenly line up at my non-existent door. My anti-Christmas CD, an annual tradition in my house, becomes a source of solace. My expertise in the music that lampoons the holidays comes into high(er) demand. Whether one genuinely hate the holidays or simply needs to vent some frustration, it seems I’m the person they turn to.
But what are the best songs for feeding your holiday angst? Well… it all depends on what you’re looking for. Here are some of my current pics in way I break them down. Read more
