Derek Flint: The Ultimate “Bond”
In the mid 60s, the Bond movies were starting to gain traction. With Sean Connery playing the role, the entire world was becoming enamored with 007, his gadgets, his witty remarks and his way with the ladies.
But while James Bond himself might have always been a borderline case of self parody, especially with his one-liners, it was a pair of movies that took that sense of humor to a natural new height. “Our Man Flint” and “In Like Flint”, also known as the “Flint” movies, lampooned Bond not through silly gags or fart jokes, but by simply being more “Bond” than 007 could ever hope to be.
If Bond has a “Bond Babe” then Flint has a dozen. If Bond is a black belt then Flint is a master of a dozen martial arts. If Bond speaks four languages, Flint speaks every single one and can talk to dolphins to boot (thus making him part Aquaman too, I suppose).
Flints movies were not action movies nor were they outright parodies, they were a strange hybrid of the two, meant to be both funny and totally awesome at the same time. Though self-aware and self-depreciating, it was still almost suave enough to pass as an actual comic book spy romp.
The Flint movies, much like their title character, is hard to nail down and define, but simply too cool to turn away from.
The Basic Premise
Flint, as mentioned above, is a parody of the Bond style of spy movie and, as such, it follows the same basic outline.
Both of the movies begin with some evil empire plotting to take over the world. In the first, “Our Man Flint”, it is a group of scientist blackmailing the world’s governments by controlling the weather and in the second, “In Like Flint”, it is a group of feminists seeking to replace the president and cower the world with nuclear weapons.
From there, it is up to Flint to stop them using a wide array of gadgets, intellect and brawn to get the job done. What turns Flint from a Bond knock off to a Bond parody is that all of this is pushed to eleven. Where Bond is super-human smart, Flint is able to pinpoint the region in the world to find bouillabaisse with the exact proportions found on the feathers of a poison dart. Where Bond has gadgets, but Flint’s cigarette lighter allegedly has 82 different functions, including the ability to shatter objects with sound.
In that regard, Flint is not a parody in the style of Austin Powers. In fact, those used to that kind of “in your face” parodying will be very lost in the Flint movies. Flint’s humor is much more subtle, coming from the sheer ridiculousness of the movie and its characters but it is a degree of silliness that is only removed from the “serious” spy movies by a razor-thin edge.
If you don’t watch the Flint movies closely, you might mistake it for a serious 60s spy flick. The humor is deadpan and requires your complete attention. Much like “Police Squad” (though not so much the “Naked Gun” movies that followed), if you aren’t thinking and aren’t aware of the culture, you don’t get the humor.
In short, it’s a spy parody for people who like spy movies.
The Good
Overall, the movies are solid in terms of writing and acting. James Coburn turns in a great performance as Derek Flint. Lee J. Cobb does an equally sound job playing the straight-edge Lloyd Cramden, who is the head of the top-secret Zonal Organization for World Intelligence and Espionage (Z.O.W.I.E.) that “commands” Flint.
However, other than those two, there aren’t any characters to speak of. The villains are stock, the women are stock, the scientists are stock, everyone one is stock and that is part of the design of the movie, watching this outrageous super-spy trample over a cardboard-cutout of a global plot.
For the most part, the movies are solid and fun. The dialog is good, the acting gets the job done and the movie manages to maintain its surreal tone throughout, keeping it just far enough removed from traditional spy flicks to make it funny but close enough to somehow make it believable at the same time.
The Bad
The first movie “Our Man Flint” is definitely the stronger of the two. Though both are somewhat slow to get off the ground, “In Like Flint” seems to drag longer and have less substance to it. To make matters worse, the gag really is played out pretty completely after the first flick and the second one doesn’t bring much new to it.
Also, despite the provocative cover art, the movies seem to suffer from an extreme lack of sexiness. Though both flicks are flooded with beautiful women, the insane volume of females being another element of the joke, none really stand out nor are given any chance to really shine. The women almost become part of the scenery, not part of the movie, a natural consequence of throwing so many at the screen at once.
For example. Flint starts both movies with either three or four beautiful live-in “playmates” and constantly has other women thrown at him through the course of the flick. Though a fitting spoof of Mr. Bond, I can think of several Bond flicks that felt sexier than either of the Flint movies, despite having much less skin and fewer women.
Still, these are not deal breakers and, in a strange way, actually add to the charm of the movies. Though the slowness seems to drag the second movie down a bit, especially during the beginning and middle, both remain enjoyable, if one can approach them with a willingness to think and laugh.
Conclusions
To be honest, the Flint movies aren’t for everyone and I have to wonder aloud who they are for. It’s a comedy without any “jokes” other than its own existence. Even if you get the jokes, you won’t likely laugh out loud or be rolling in the aisles.
Flint is, in my opinion, a movie targeted at the Mystery Science Theater 3000 crowd, it is a movie for people who like to make fun of movies. You can sit there, do you best Tom Servo impression and insult this movie with immunity. That is what it was made for.
If that sounds like a good way to spend an evening to you, then you will love Flint.
This is not to say that Flint is a “bad” movie, like the ones usually features on MST3K, but rather. that it is one that invites itself to be laughed at, not with. If you like that kind of thing, then you’re probably a mean spirited person that shouldn’t be allowed near children, but definitely someone who is going to enjoy the Flint movies.
Honestly though, I think that says more about you than the movies…
